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I have been attempting to write something since about Monday – obviously failing miserably as I have yet to post – but today I am determined to FINALLY get something on my blog!
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So what’s new blogdom?
Well…
Hunter got home safe and sound from his travels yesterday evening. He had a great time but has decided that *country living* is not for him and he has a new-found respect for living in Rhode Island where everything is SO close.
Indeed!
Can you believe the kids go back to school on Tuesday?
In other news…
I quit my job.
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I was offered the choice to transfer to another studio and intially I thought that would work, but the more I digested the whole situation, the more I decided that I needed to completely break ties.
Ultimately it came down to doing what was best for myself.
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And yes, there is SO much more I could say about the situation, but I choose to let it lay where it lies and move on.
Now I am basically putting my resume out there and focusing on the belief that all of this happened for a reason and I am meant to be somewhere else doing something else.
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I LOVE photography and it IS a true passion of mine –- but retail photography is a whole other animal and I would think long and hard before returning to it.
I wish I had the spare funds to just buy the equipment I need and finally get my own biz underway…
Someday I WILL be living that dream!
And yeah the potential financial crunch of up and quitting my job is a wee bit scary.
Just when Brian finally gets his promotion and things are looking up I have job issues. Sometimes it feels like we will never get a break? But I keep telling myself that all of this is for a reason…
Not sure just yet what the reason is, but I insist on having a positive attitude and hope!
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Moving along…
So I haven’t written about my diet and/or exercise in eons and well, basically that is because it has taken a backseat to everything else going on in my life.
I put my focus on getting myself better and getting a hold of the depression – so my weight loss journey needed to be put on a short hiatus.
I have to get better from the inside out after all…
But as of Monday I am back on track and happy to say that even despite completely throwing diet caution to the wind for a month or better I only regained about 1.5 lbs. – shocking I know!
I am sad to say that I completely fell of the vegan and even the vegetarian wagon…
I made it four months without one bite of meat and just caved for a hamburger on the grill and went downhill from there…
Not very proud of my lack of self-control but I am proud that I intially vowed to go vegetarian for 30 days and far surpassed that goal. I am not a total carnivore again – but I have partaken and certainly cannot call myself a vegetarian.
Maybe in time I will go back to eating vegetarian? But vegan was just too restricted and not right for me.
Right now my goals are –
• Eat healthy -- less processed garbage and more whole/clean foods.
• Exercise – gym, walking, and finally CONQUERING The 30 Day Shred.
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Also NO OBSESSING over dieting, food, weight, the scale and all of that stuff because obsessing over it does the polar opposite of what I am trying to achieve.
And in all honesty -- I am friggen sick of feeling bad about myself and inadequate because I am not at a certain weight.
That is just utter crappola.
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Until recently I have NEVER felt overly inadequate in ANY aspect of my life – matter of fact I felt QUITE adequate and screw anyone who thought otherwise.
And that is the attitude I am slowly regaining.
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Maybe it’s the new meds?
They have given me this intense sense of clarity and so much of what bothered me before is slowly being weeded out of my life.
I feel like old kickass, take no crap, rockin it no matter what ME again.
And it feels good to be that gal again because she wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought she was.
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And that dear blog-o-sphere is all that is fit to be told!
Well other than this...
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*snicker*
cyn
Wow Cyn! I have to say - you are just what I needed today! I sympathize, empathize and totally get what you are saying. Screw those who can't appreciate me for who/what/how I am!
ReplyDeleteI have fallen off the WW wagon - to the tune of 15# up since Memorial Day! Just getting back on track this week myself. I know where I've gone astray and will do what I can to lose the weight that I've put back on.
All the best on the work situation.
xoxo
Kim
Things might not be perfect, but it sounds like you have a great perspective on it all.
ReplyDeleteI have 2 drafts that I started and haven't finished yet. They've been sitting there for 2 weeks... I'll get to them eventually. That reminds me... I should post an update before I leave on my epic vacation!
Glad to hear you're doing okay lady.
ReplyDelete"Thou shall not take shit" is now my motto for life :) I'm glad you quit your job, it definitely seemed like it was just a stressful place and I'm a firm believer in our careers should be where we *want* to be, not *have* to be. So KUDOS and congrats! I'm sure you'll find something amazing and perfect soon because your new attitude is beautiful!
ReplyDeleteOh...and was the hamburger amazing or what?! XOXOXO
I think instinct kicks in when I'm eating a banana, no eye contact for real.
ReplyDeletegood luck w/ the job hunt
kim -- ahhh so you totally feel my pain. sucks that it goes back on WAY easier (and more fun i might add) than it came off. oh well, time to dust off and get our asses back on the wagon. we can do it! xxoo sweets!
ReplyDeletemarie -- yes updates before the epic vacay is a MUST!
rachel -- thanks doll!
katherine -- my new motto too -- dontcha love it? and yes, the burger was almost better than really good sex... lol!
todd -- that was addressed to everyone BUT you of course... lol!